A Letter To My Friends



We are so lucky, despite our trials.



This video brings tears to my eyes each time I view it (as I have mentioned before, tears are part of everything lately). I am happy this girl agreed to make this video. She demonstrates courage, which is the making of action in-spite of fear.

I have been doing a lot of self evaluation recently. After the passing of my dad I felt as if one of my life's rocks(be it a large and squishy, huggable rock) had been removed. So large of an influence was he that I didn't even realize just how much he held me up until he was gone. Maybe that is how it is for everyone when they lose a parent and I was just very unaware until experiencing it myself.

Loss comes in so many forms, not just in death alone. That is why this video spoke directly to my inner stuttering self.  No, I may not suffer from an outward speech impediment as this girl, but I definitely have an inward one that hinders my life's interactions. I have worked so very hard to hide it, overcome it, get rid of it, and everything else that would keep it far, far away. Somehow, the loss of my dad has sent me right back to my childhood insecurities. Where has my confidence gone to? I was visiting with some friends the other day and was probably visibly shaking, for that is what was happening on the inside. It took some work to control it. What is happening to me?!

In some ways I am horrified to have returned to my old childlike state, yet in others I am respectfully grateful. I want to hug the little insecure girl within myself and tell her some of the little bits of wisdom I have gained in living, despite fears and insecurities. For example, I definitely have been given a greater compassion and empathy for others, particularly young children, but especially for others that seem to be the outcast, the shy, and the troubled. I am learning that I wouldn't trade my weaknesses and internal infirmities for anything, because they are what makes the good parts of me, good. Like this adorable, huggable girl in this video, I too can help others as I reach out in love and compassion. It is scary. Fear will always trail alongside of me, but courage coupled together with action and grace from God will bring continued healing and strengthening not only to my aching heart but to those I serve with love.

My wish today is that all within the sound of my small voice may know that you are a child of a loving God. He made you unique. That includes your outward and inward infirmities that probably will stick with you your entire life. Embrace them as part of you, and do what it takes to learn to carry, and walk with them, and use them for good. I promise the Lord will bless you and others as you do so. I promise you will feel His love for you, a very sweet, tender and pure love for you. I leave you this promise in His name, even Jesus Christ. Amen



Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Fine Tuning a Listening Ear

Image
    The last chapter of 3 Nephi begins with the word hearken. In fact, several times throughout these last chapters of 3 Nephi, the people of our day are given warnings and told to hearken. Throughout the Book of Mormon we are called to attention with such words as hearken, listen, give heed, and behold. When we come across one of these words, it is wise to slow the pace and pay attention. Bishop H. David Burton spoke of hearkening to the word of the Lord in General Conference: "Perhaps the greatest obstacle to our ability to hearken courageously to the word of the Lord involves our egos, vain ambitions, and pride. It seems that the proud find it burdensome to hear and accept the instruction of God. We are told in Proverbs that “pride goeth before destruction” ( Prov. 16:18 )."  I have been consistently, almost daily, reading the Book of Mormon for over a year now. I took part of a Relief Society challenge and read the entire Book of Mormon last fall, then I began
Read more

"If we acknowledge Him now, He will lovingly acknowledge and gladly admit us then!”

Image
  I have come to the part in the Book of Mormon where a reversal of roles has taken place. Those people(the Lamanites) that had once been taught, now become the teachers. Many of the Nephites had become prideful and ignored their own prophets, so the Lord sent a Lamanite prophet, Samuel, to warn them to repent and prepare for the coming of the Lord. The Nephites didn't like what Samuel had to tell them. A miracle was brought about as Samuel was divinely protected from the arrows of the angry Nephites. In thinking about these chapters I am amazed at how a righteous people, in a matter of a few short years, had come to a wicked state as to seek the death of a servant and prophet of the Lord. How can we protect ourselves from falling prey to the destruction that comes when we are stuck in the pride cycle as described in the chapters of Helaman? One of Samuel's purposes of teaching the Nephites was to remind them of the coming of Christ. Why would teaching about the Savior, Je
Read more

Friendship

Image
Being a mother of teenagers, I am introduced to many things that I otherwise may not have found interesting, or on my own. One of which is music. My playlist is getting quite diverse since my daughter has learned that I have a weakness for good music. All she needs say is "Mom, I found this song, you should listen to it...and then buy it." She has learned that if the message is good, I generally don't hesitate to click the 'buy' button. Yesterday she introduced me to one such song.(see link below)  I don't know the artist's reasoning and vision behind the lyrics, but I felt that it was singing about love, hope, and helping one another through the battles of life. In short, it sings of friendship. Since I am limited in my talent abilities to sing, or create through works of art when I am inspired, I will take the feelings I felt while listening and try to convey those ideas into words. Joseph Smith gave us a glimpse of his measure of friend
Read more